Raw Superwoman

I have to tell you, my journey to health has been a long one. While it’s hard to believe today, 8 years ago I was addicted to nicotine. This article is for people who want to succeed at quitting smoking once and for all.

Quitting smoking is actually quite simple. You either smoke or you don’t. It’s not like striving to eat a healthy diet or being fit – the very definition of which can be quite complex. I’m not saying that quitting smoking is easy, I am just saying that as far as problems go, it is a simple one to solve. All you have to do is not smoke.

I have broken down the process of “becoming a non-smoker” into 7 steps, which can be followed by anyone in order to succeed.

Step 1. Answer this question: Do I really want to quit?

There is one thing you must do. You need to be honest with yourself about two things a) why you want to quit and b) why you don’t want to quit.

There are reasons for why you don’t want to quit, and those reasons are keeping you smoking. Don’t deny them. Face them head on. If you want to succeed at becoming a non-smoker, you must face the reasons for why you aren’t one yet.

Take out a sheet of paper. Make two columns: Reasons to Quit. Reasons to Smoke. Think deeply about this and write down your reasons. Then give each reason a grade out of 10 for how important it is to you. After you’re finished, total up each column. Which column carries the greater weight?

After I did this exercise, it became so blatantly clear to me that I needed to seriously quit. Sure, I had some good reasons to continue smoking.
I enjoyed smoking. I liked to have that smoke with my coffee. It was “my thing”. I liked the social aspect of it (I made many friends in the smoke pit). I liked being the baaad girl (that’s right). But when I looked on the other side and saw all the other reasons, I was blown away. What I really wanted was to be FREE. I wanted to be able to go for a hike without my lungs being in pain. I wanted to wake up without phlegm in my throat. It was so clear to me that any effort that was required to quit was worth it and greatly outweighed any advantages to smoking.

Keep this list. Stick it on your wall. Refer to it when required. I still have mine, even though I created it nearly a decade ago.

Getting to this place of clarity is an important step. Look within yourself and get in touch with your reasons, not anyone else’s reasons. For example, when I smoked, I was very well aware that smoking was going to cut down my life span. Everyone told me: “Smoking kills”. At 21, I didn’t care. I had other reasons and they had nothing to do with my longevity. I wanted to feel energetic in the morning. I wanted to go up a mountain and not have to struggle for breath. Make sure that the reasons you write down are your true reasons. This process will also help you see your addiction as something separate from yourself. Unless you are crystal clear on why you want to quit, that little monster inside of you will convince you to light up that cigarette, every time.

Your experience might be different. You might have the opposite epiphany and realize that you don’t actually want to quit. Perhaps your family or your spouse wants you to and you think you probably should, but, actually, deep down inside you don’t really want to. If this is the case, don’t even bother trying to quit as all your efforts will prove futile.

Step 2. Wait until you are ready.

You know you are ready to quit when you are actually excited at the prospect of becoming a non-smoker.

Step 3. Realize that there is no right time to quit.

There is no right time to quit. Don’t delude yourself that such a time exists. The right time to quit is when you are ready and as soon as possible.

When I wanted to quit smoking, I could never find the right time. There was always a party, an event, a birthday or the holidays coming up. But when the time came, I knew. I was ready.

There was only one problem.

My cousin’s wedding was coming up. It would be two weeks of parties, festivities, rehearsals, family gatherings; you name it, it was going to happen. Any other time, I would have said, “Nope. I’m going to wait until all this is over. Then I’ll quit”. But I caught myself using the wedding as an excuse and I got mad at myself. Life is life. There’s always going to be stressful situations coming up. There’s always going to be things going on. There is never going to be a perfect time. So I decided to do it. Right then and there. About 3 weeks before the wedding. When I thought about it, I was scared, because I thought it will be hard to get through it without smoking. But I told myself that I’m simply starting with a hard challenge. If I can get over this big bump – I’ll be able to get through anything! So that was my goal. Just get through the next couple of weeks. I was became completely fixated on this goal. It was hard, but I reached it.

Whatever event which may be coming up in your life is not a valid excuse to delay quitting smoking, if you are ready to quit. It is possible to get through it. If you are truly ready, you can do it.

Step 4. Find a support person.

You need to have support and you need to communicate to people what it is that you are doing so they won’t offer you cigarettes.

One thing you need to understand, is that people might be supportive on the outside, but they still might sabotage your progress, even if they do so subconsciously. The truth is they want you in “The Smoking Club”. Your decision to quit challenges their decision to remain a smoker, whether
you or they realize it or not. My family supposedly supported me, but they still smoked inside the house even when I asked them not to.

People may erroneously assume that you are “trying to be better than them”. They might see themselves as inferior to you, and may want you to just not do it. And they would feel a lot more comfortable if you just went back to your old self. Don’t judge people for this. Chances are they will be on the same path you are in their own good time, but it is a journey that they must be ready for. But make sure you know where your true support system is.

I was so lucky to have a great support person. My best friend at the time, Sharoni, sent me little e-postcards, encouraging me to continue and telling me how proud she was for how far I’ve come. I know that might not be available to everyone. There’s places you can go for help. E-mail me and I’ll be more than happy to help you.

It doesn’t matter who your support person is. What matters is that they will keep you accountable and celebrate your success with you.

Step 5. Become a non-smoker.

Become a non-smoker in your mind, before you physically stop smoking. Create a clear vision of your non-smoking life in your mind. Go back to your reasons for why you want to be a non-smoker. Expand on them. What will you gain from becoming a non-smoker? What will you lose if you delay quitting smoking or never quit at all?

I wanted to get out and be able to do the things I wasn’t able to do. I wanted to run, to be fit, to have energy, clarity, vitality and no pain. I now realize that I became that person before I even quit. People kept telling me that I’ll always be a smoker, but I didn’t believe them. In my mind, I was already a non-smoker, long before I quit, all I had to do was, well, not smoke.

Step 6. Stop smoking.

Now it is time to stop.

If you want to free yourself from an addictive substance you need to cut it out completely, 100%, no exceptions whatsoever. You are an addict. You can’t just have one at the party. If you are addicted, you simply need to get it out of your system completely, otherwise, you could end up at ground zero in absolutely no time at all. Remember – you are only 1 cigarette away from smoking a whole pack.

Now I’m not saying that you can’t wean yourself off it gradually. If that works for you, fine.

However, I think the best way to quit is to just go cold-turkey.

Yes, there will be extreme withdrawal symptoms. But you can use those to your advantage, because you can feel the huge difference that is taking place in your body. Yes, it hurts, but something wonderful is actually happening.

On the 3rd day, I lied in my bed all day long. I was so frustrated, I cried. I had tears rolling down my face, that is how much I wanted to smoke. But you have to persist through it. Consider, that it only takes your body at most a week to get rid of the physical addictions. It is like a drug addict in rehab. They go through their whole withdrawal thing, then one day they wake up and the physical addiction is gone. That’s seriously how I felt. That pain was the pain of getting myself out of that smoker’s body. It was the metamorphosis of my new life. I was a non-smoker in a smoker’s body.

When you get over that first bump, know that the hardest part is behind you. When I reached that stage (day 6), I was euphoric. It’s the farther I had ever come, and I just knew in my heart that I was finally free.

Step 7. Enjoy a smoke-free life.

One thing which I did not expect to be on my “Reasons to Quit” list is the benefit of serving as an example to other people. My sister was so inspired by my ability to quit, she quit herself a few months later, and has been smoke-free ever since.

After I quit smoking, the quality of my life improved immensely. Because I could breathe, I could actually begin to exercise. After work, when I was quitting smoking, I would go for long walks, which I loved. I enjoyed this new found freedom. I could smell and taste thing better. I rarely experienced headaches, whereas before, I think I had a permanent headache, which I wasn’t even aware of. With time, I build up to being able to run and play tennis. I became a lot more fit and happy. More time went by and I got into hiking. I climbed more mountains and today I have more summits under my belt than I can count. I jog and rock climb regularly now and I love it. I could have never done any of that, or at least not at the level that I do, had I remained a smoker. Non-smoking is as much a habit as smoking was. I don’t ever think about it, it is completely out of my life.

This is how I saw myself back when I was trying to quit smoking. Visualize yourself as a non-smoker who is stuck in the body of a smoker, which is addicted to nicotine. And it will happen. Whatever your vision of your non-smoking life is, if you really believe it, it will become true.

The long-term psychological aspects are trickier to deal with. Old habits and rituals die hard. But they do die.
At the beginning, you have 3 main milestones to get through: 1) 3 days 2) 3 weeks and 3) 3 months. After that, you are mostly done.
You just have to keep going. Expect to dream about smoking and waking up happy it was only a dream.

In conclusion…

The journey, however difficult, is worth it.

It doesn’t matter if you’ve failed in the past. In fact, the more times have tried to quit in the past, the better the chance of your success in the future. The more you try to quit, the more you learn, and the greater your chances of success. Once you come out safely on the other side, as millions of people like me have already done, you can begin to enjoy a new wonderful life smoke and addiction free. Whatever happens, be good to yourself.

I wish you the best of luck!